1 hour to live.

we were having this recruitment session at bintang mall and we (me and my cabbage head friend) had a nice chat bout life. she asked me to read a lovely poem in this book she read. i read and i passed it back to her. it is lovely and sweet.meaningful and honest. at the last page of this book its written "if you were to have 1 more hour to live, who would you call and why, and why are you waiting? ".

so she ask me if i have time why not post a blog entry on "if you were to have 1 more hour to live, who would you call, and why and why are you waiting? "

at first i didnt get what she meant. then i requested to read the question in that book.only then i understood it.

now here goes. if i only have 1 hour to live i would call my mom. why? i believe i have failed her, and i just wanted to apologize for it. i failed her in many ways that you can imagine. i failed her by being me. i failed her by simply walk away from home. i failed her by not being able to be what she wanted me to be. i failed her by ignoring her advices. i failed her by telling lies over and over again. i failed her by not being true to myself. just simply fail.

why am i waiting to make that call? i dont know. i really dont. maybe i just afraid that she might cry. afraid that i would hurt her in anyways. afraid that i would end up telling more lies just to make her stop crying. and i dont want that. i know she have a fragile heart. and i would not do anything to hurt her more. i know one day i must ask for forgiveness from her. i just dont think now is the best time. and yet i dont know when is the best time.

i think i basically answered the question? now why not you?