Love Hate

Ok. Well, before this i am a blackberry user. Not that i have stop using bb, i will still use bb again once i have fix my bb. Anyway.. i prefer use bb for msging. Or chat.it easier to type while driving. Ok well not all the time.. But have to say, now that im using android i find it quite convenience to browse, zoom and etc. Ok well. I still miss my bb tho. Its a present from my omani student. Ok one more thing is, i kmow my fingerbis considered small dy, but evrytime i completed a pharagraph of words i found out that i have a lot of typo. When i say a lot. I mean a lot k. Ok..whateva it is.. i now can blog from my fon yeeehhaaaaaa...but still missing mr blackberry.

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) kali ini, ia bukanlah suatu realiti, h anya sekadar imaginasi diluar sedarku, malam tadi, sekembalinya aku dari bermain badminton bersama teman, membersihkan diri dan bersiap2 untuk tidur, sangkaanku, aku pasti terus tidur lena, tapi hatiku tergerak untuk bergayut dengan kekasih hati, lalu ku dail saja nombor si dia, 2 jam bergayut akhirnya terlena juga aku dengan talian talifon yang masih terhubung, mimpi ku malam tadi di mulai dengan saat pernikahan.aku. aku menangis kerana membayangkan waliku.. masa tak dapat diputarkan. kalian mungkin sudah mengerti mengapa. sayu benar mimpi itu.memang dapat ku rasa air mata ku mengalir laju. namun malam masih muda, termimpi pula mengenai A.. entah mengapa.. mungkin rasa bersalah menerpa hatiku semenjak dua menjak ini.. tapi, tak dapat diturutkan rasa kasihanku ini.. dia bahkan tanpa rasa kasihan membuat mak sedih selama ini.. tapi mimpi kali ini tiada pula air mata. cuma per...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) seperti yg dijanjikan, sinetron sambungan tetap ada, tapi tak tahu sama ada tindakan kami tu bakal membuatkan A insaf atau tidak. apa yg kami harapkan cuma dia berubah dan menyayangi keluarganya seperti kami menyayangi dia.. kami juga berharap perkongsian cerita ini menjadi iktibar buat kalian sebagai pembaca. selepas menerima panngilan talifon dari M tempoh hari, saya sebenarnya telah memohon cuti seminggu memandangkan kerja2 di office tidaklah begitu banyak. selepas menghadiri dinner syarikat pada 24hb, keesokan paginya saya pulang ke bintulu, saya berharap dengan pulangnya saya ke rumah, sedikit sebanyak mengurangkan beban pemikiran mak. yes, dia memang kurang, tapi saya pulak yg terlebih banyak. dah bila saya balik, ada la extra kereta yg nak digunakan, saya tanya, kenapa kereta kancil and satria tak dguna, mak cakap, bateri kererta A dh jual.. bertambah mengejutkan lagi bila mereka beritahu saya, 50% dari hiasan tembaga rumah kami ...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) Bila mak dah mula menangis lagi.. saya nekad..takkan ada rasa kesian lagi dengan perangai A. saya memang sudah berhenti kesian dengan nasib A. dah lama.. tapi dia sendiri yg tak pernah berusaha nk majukan diri.. cemana? saya benci apa yang dia dah buat kat mak, adik2 and anak bini dia.. bila saya kol mak tadi, mak menangis, dia dah tak sanggup nak pendam semua dugaan tu sorang2.. bukan takda yang dapat diharap sane. cume tak tahu cemane nk luahkan kut..(itu pendapat saya) saya cakap kat mak, dari hari tu lagi saya dah bg kata pendapat, hantar saje ke pusat pemulihan, tapi mak cakap nk bagi dia peluang lagi.. saya dah sangat masak dengan perangai A ni. jadi saya tahu dia pasti akan buat lagi perangai.. tak lame pastu..dgr lagi cerita dia wat hal, dan hari ni.. M kol saya. bgtau dia mengamok di tempat N keje.. pastu balik rumah sambung lagi keamukan dia, abis semua brg dia rosakkan.. mmg nak mati betol A ni.. M mintak saya amik emergency...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) Dear budak gemok, banyak yang kite dah lalui dalam setahun hubungan kita ni. pahit manis masam masin semua la... tapi hingga saat ini kite masih di sini, masih terus berada disisi masing2.. tak kira apa pun cubaan. kite hadapi bersama.. itu janji kite kan? susah senang sama2..  walau pada awal hubunga kite, saya banyak menangis, namun tawa dan senyuman juga tak pernah hilang dari wajah saya, begitu juga dengan awak, saya benci bila mendengar awak menangis di hujung talian, kerna tangisan awak membuat saya rasa bersalah, saya garang kan wak? macam mak tiri tak?hahhaha... tapi awak tetap tabah melayan karenah saya dan betapa terumbang ambingnya mood saya,, especially mase datang bulan..kesian awak.. tapi nasib baik kite jauh. taklah awak kene physical abuse oleh saya.. jauh2 macam ni, boleh la selalu rindu, bile jumpe terubat rindu berbulan2.. bile terpaksa berpisah lagi, saya sedih, tapi saya diamkan aje.. sebab yakin akan j...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) pagi2 isnin dah terima whatsapp dr sis gedik saya di bintulu. katanya si A buat hal lagi. aku saje je whatsapp untuk wish good luck kat dia sebab SPM start semalam. tiba2 received reply yg tak diduga. aku tanya: apa lagi si gila tu buat? patutla status N plek2 je d facebook.plus harini kan bday dia, statrt la dia wat gila. sis reply: entah dia cuba nk bunuh diri malam tadi. pastu Z tampar dia 3 kali. perrggghhh.. (memang dia taip gini ar) pastu M bagi amaran kalo dia wat gila lagi anta terus ke pusat pemulihan akhlak. pastu saya tanya lagi.:Gila! cemane tu? sis reply: dia gantong diri kat tangga tu. saya reply lagi: kenape tak biar je? sis: Ngok. mana tau, Z yg tampar dia . 3 kali. saya lagi: ada kamu sambut bday dia? sis: Entah. macam tak.tapi mcm dia sambut ngn family dia aja. saya: Gila. sot. **perbualan tamat di situ. pastu semalam saya kol mak untuk tanya lagi details hal tu. ape punca dia jadi cmtu. mak ckp, ntah tak tau. datang...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) haritu nak post pasal raya, tapi tak bawa lappy pulak mase balik bintulu, anyway, ni behind the story punye kisah, malam sebelum raya haji, tiba2, si A buat hal, ngamok entah pasal ape, hentam sume brg2 dlm bilik dia, (actually dia marah bini dia pasal keje mase raye) so what? punya lah kecik hal tu nk dbesar2kan macam la bini dia nmpk yg dia p ngamok2 cmtu kan?padahal bini dia tgh busy keje mlm raya, dia?ade? anyway, mase tu tgh pegang ank dia, bila dia start wat hal, aku tnya la, 'nape ngamok2 ni?gila ka?' then tak lame pastu naik plak si Z, siap bawa besi lagi. aku cuak gak, tapi biar je, dia p tendang pintu bilik tu sampai tercabut. dasatkan? pastu, dia melenting la, cakap macam2 kat A. yg A ni diam je. jeling dalam keadaan tak waras(palau/mabok), mule2 aku tgk je, Z pukul katel, bengkok besi tu, pastu, A ni tiba2 ckap, pukul lah, ape lagi si Z baran la,n terus pukul pakai besi tu.. aku terus jerit pggl org kat bawah.. gi...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar)  Dear Abah, it has been 6 years since you passed away, and i am still missing you hard each day, i cant cry, i dunno why, perhaps, i grew stronger each day, now that we have 2 more new people (Rania and Nina)  in the family, it does feel like our family are complete again even after you and nenek 'went away', i miss you and nenek so much, abah, suddenly i feel like crying because i truely miss you, i was hoping that you would be the wali when i finally get married, but now it's only in my dream, it's hurt to think about that day, but we have to move on right?we have to. mak is happy now, me and maden is currently working, abang is on and off to sea, Rania is growing up, she's too cute, how i wish you can see you granddaughter. how i wish you can see mine too. maybe in 2-3 years time. =) hopefully.or maybe 4 years time.lol. anyway, all of us are growing mature and taller. Lilut's shoe size is bigger than mine no...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) sedeh sangat hari ni.. pasal tiga2 web browser kena block dari tgk one piece. how can this be? i want to updates myself with the latest episode. not gonna watch it during my work time. salu tgk after 5 or during lunch break what? bek korg g block sume blog jugak kan? sedeh sangat.. anyway less than 3 weeks lagi nk jumpe kekasih gemokku.. rase lame plak tak jumpe.. rindu yg teramat sangat... nk buat stock byk2..standby utk cuti seminggu yg akn ku tempuh nanti.. stock hair clip and pin brooch la..jgn nk kuning plak yer... anyway, sedeh balik bile ingat one piece..huhuhu... ok ya'all..tu je untuk kali ni..

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) bila dah busy memanjang takde mase plak nk update blog. bila dah ade mase takde idea plak nk update blog. lol.. anyway...just nk update the latest hand craft yg telah saya buat di sepanjang hari2 yg telah berlalu.. MOdel 1 Wong Wei Chen Model 2 Lolita Uding Model 3 Cecille Michelle felt hair clip rm2 each Colorful rossa rm 1 each Daisy hair clip rm 2 each Felt  flower pin brooch rm2 each Hair clip rm2 each hair clip 2 rm2 each headband experimental rm2 each mini flower pin brooch rm 1 each pin brooch rm 2 each ribbon pin brooch rm2 each spiral mini hair clp rm1 each spiral mini pin brooch rm1 each anyway.. these are only updates, some of the item here may not be available any more. but few new more pin brooch will be uploaded via facebook. now that my sister is helping me out, i have more orders to complete. any how, i only have night time to do all those orders. ...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) hi bloggers, been wanting to update my lame blog. but havent have the idea just yet, was forced by kak leen (bukan nama sebenar) to update my blog.. and here i am..babling nonsence.. anyway, today i'm thinking of promoting my home made craft. been selling it to my colleague and fellow students. at the moment, the most expensive hair clip and pin brooch im selling is RM2. so feel free to view the pic. anyway, the pic mite be a bit blur due to the fact that my bb cam just suck! rite. happy scrolling down. ribbon brooch RM1.50  ribbon felt RM2 3d hair clip rm1.50 small butterfly pin RM1 double daisy rm2 kemboja brooch rm1.50 chrysanthemum brooch rm2  Lsize flower hair clip rm2 butterfly hair clip rm1.50 flowery ribbon brooch rm2 feathered flowery pin rm2 ribbon flowery hair clip rm2 Lsize iron maiden rm2 double flower hair clip rm2 ribbon ha...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) it has been a while since my last post on Raya. anyway, am starting a new business on felt brooches and hair clips. check my fb to view album.  Reyyanna's Arts anyway .. this project actually started by helping my lil sister with her pencil box design that she make for her friends. \ whichn is for sale. later she was asking if i knew how to make a brooch pins. so i was like trying my luck there. at the end of the day, i end up creating more than 5 pins. and then we all decided to buy more materials and create more pins. and there you have it. new business at Raya. =) my brooch may not be that creative enough for certain people. may not be attractive enough to open a shop. but this is my passion to arts. you like it you buy. if you dont please drop critics. i would like to improve. and expand. =)

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) been wanting to post something about this year raya, however, i dun feel like celebrating it to the max this year, have cough and flu since day 1. got fever 1 day before. needing to get well soon, as i am the one who cook  pagi raya dishes... mak depend on me soooo much... its day 4. and im not done yet with my cough and flu... thats why i dont feel like visiting my friend's house and even the neighbor's. its day 4 of raya and its 9 months of me and nizam relationship. relief that we both can survive up to this date. well you know what they say about long distance relationship rite? alot of things to sacrifice... yeah,...we sacrifice a lot..time..money..and etc.. this year raya,, it has been 6 years raya without abah,, the sad feeling is now lessen i guess.. instead of grieving at abah's and nenek's cemetery we share our loves and hearts by praying. nenek passed away last march. 11 days after i celebrated my 25th bi...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) hi... just came back to office after 1 week of holiday + 16 days of sick leave. can you believe?almost a month rite?ya..almost.. anyway, 3 more days to cuti raya.am so happy. suma persiapan raya dah ready. cume tinggal beli baju eah je lagi. sudah betul nk cari baru rona coklet yg menarik. ade yg bkenan tapi takut eah tak nak pulak. hari jemat sebelum balik akan tengok2 mane yg bkenan lagi.mane tau last minit punye brg. anyway..nk cite sal sakit hari tu.. pengalaman yg paling tak dapat dilupe. 1st week of puasa, i go back to hometown. saje2 amik cuti. nk puase ngn family. then on 26th july i go back miri. a day before that.. i notice one small lump growing at the left of my genital area. at first it does not cause me much pain. but when it started to grow bigger it causes more pain than ever. i usually have this small lump after or during my period time. but this one, never has it pain like this one. so i decided, when i get back to miri...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) tanggal 5 julai jugak, sy terkejut menerima berita kematian suami kepada colleague sy. dan pada tanggal itu juga, si mamat yg hilang (Adi) menghantar sms, (kindly noted that i am in Brunei at this date) - actually kakak tu la yang promote adi ni kat saya. or promote saya kat adi ni. kandungannya 'Salam, hari tok kamek operation, sejak perkenalan kamek dengan kitak, hidup kamek sempurna adanya kitak, cuma kamek lalai seketika. Jika Allah ambil  kamek hari tok semoga kita dapat jumpa di syurga Allah SWT dan itu doa kamek terakhir." katanyeee... ok. sepulangnya saya dari traveling. saya pun pergi ke konsert Zee Avi ..tiba2 saya terima sms dari adik saya, memberitahu bahawa lelaki tak gune ni dtg rumah saya di bintulu and bagitahu, esok dia akan operation. (celake tak?) dia bgtahu saya 5 july, tp dia bgtahu mak saya 8 july(Ahad). boleh? nk tipu tu biar cover2 la sikit kan?ni nampak sangat bodohnyeeee... nasib bek la, mase dia mule2 dtg j...

by RihanNa (bukan Nama Sebenar) it was Thursday 5th July when I received BBM from LadybirdMolly , she said i was selected again by SWKblogs to be a rep for Zee Avi homecoming concert at indoor stadium on Saturday. i was at that time needing a good music to relax from the past few weeks of hell.. so its said, that i am going for Zee Avi concert. yippee...  you can see the purple tag up here is the official tag for Zee Avi concert. its 6.30pm . yes i am early...(semengat orang sarawak namanya)  i was early so i took a shot at the stage. while waiting for for Joe , i loitered outside the stadium with Cik Leen (bukan nama sebenar). When Joe came, we wait for Mark (rep from STB ) to get our tag from him.while waiting, Datuk Haji Talip Zulpilip arrived at the main entrance. it was a slow nite i can say. but people are starting to filled up the stadium as we twitted about it. some of the audiences purposely wait outside the stadium....